Saturday, May 27, 2006

Just thought you'd like to know

I've thought of 10 more things that annoy me. They are, in no particular order:

1. Adult women who twirl their hair like they are a child. I want to slap their hands and say "No!"

2. Women who wear royal blue mascara with matching blue eyeliner. I should find it funny, but it comes out annoying.

3. Adult women who try to dress like their teenaged/twenty-something daughters. Puh-lease!

4. People who talk to their pets while on the phone talking to a real person. Just. Don't.

5. People who attempt to breathe, smoke and talk on the phone all at the same time. Some folks have it mastered, but the majority doesn’t seem to have it down.

6. Heart-shaped jewelry. Makes me think of the fake plastic jewelry you can get out of a bubblegum machine.

7. People who carry bad childhood traits with them to adulthood. For example: tantrums, and pouting.

8. Pseudo-scientific beauty commercials. "Our cream has amino peptides!" Great. You know what that means? First, it's redundant. All peptides have amino groups. Peptides are proteins. Every living thing is made of proteins. Or "Our cream has caffeine in it to wake up your skin!" Um, no. Caffeine wakes you up when you ingest it. In the lab, we use caffeine in our experiments on cells because it fucks them up.

9. Pseudo-scientific TV. Now, I love CSI and Law and Order and their kin as much as the next girl, but I always have to laugh when they oversimplify something, or horribly mispronounce things in their dramatically dark and backlit labs. For example: the acronym ELISA is pronounced “eh-lye-za”, not “eh-lees-ah”. Also, there is no way they could supposedly use all of the instruments and protocols they claim to and get an answer by the end of the day – it just doesn’t work that way.

10. Pseudo-scientific newscasters that have no idea what they’re talking about. My favorite: a piece on chlorophyll, and the newscasters feel the need to point out “chlorophyll can be found in any green plant like broccoli or lettuce.” I’m sorry, but no shit, Sherlock. You learn that in middle school.


Blogger dressagemom said...

About CSI and shows like that - they annoy me so much I can't even watch em. Why they are so popular I have no idea.

11:34 AM  
Blogger craig said...

Ugh, don't even get her started. Before CSI even started, she saw a commercial in which they scooped up a handful of mealworms and called them "maggots." CSI was forever banished from our house for that reason alone.

8:13 AM  
Blogger Lil Kate said...

One I almost forgot! The baby formula commercial that touts the formula contains "comfort proteins" for baby's delicate digestion. What the hell.

9:03 AM  
Blogger Chris B. said...

And you get migraines? Knock me over with a feather.

Wait right there, soldier. I'll get a ladder, and we'll see if we can string you a little higher.

12:53 AM  

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