Tuesday, March 18, 2008

Alright already! Something worth blogging about

It’s been an exciting month since I last posted. I know, I know, I haven’t been good about posting regularly. The new BFs? As you know, they can be rather time consuming.

And though I know my scant readership rather well, I still feared you all putting on your judgy pants, so I will come clean now and admit there has been more going on behind the scenes than I’ve been letting on. I do keep secrets from you, yes I do.

First off – my little Stepbro got married! So, congrats to him and his new Dutch bride. The wedding was awesome even though half the family came down with one bug or another the following week (including me). Knocked me on my ass for 3 days, and I’m just about at 95% now. It’s two weeks later. These are tenacious bugs. Be forewarned. I suggest you regularly douse yourself in ethanol or other antibacterial substances. Avoid the public in general.

Now, on to the good part.

You all know that BF and I have rather thoroughly covered all important topics (potential “deal breakers” if you will) in regards to relationships when we started dating. No reason to beat around the bush – best to get it all out in the open and decide if we can tolerate each other right off the bat. Hiding “the crazy” is not allowed – let it all out and see who bolts first.

No bolting happened.

In December I was struck with the urge to inform BF “You do realize that you are going to marry me someday, right?” To which he unhesitatingly replied, “I know.”

Trust me, I was as shocked as you to hear that come out of my practical and (usually) rational mouth. More shocked that he was already aware of what I was informing him. Little stinker, waiting on me to mention it first.

We successfully survived the holiday season (complete with letting our parents in on our plans – and getting nothing but excited support in return). I get along with his kids. We can divvy up chores like old pros. We tease each other with less-than-serious proposals. We make each other very happy.

Come February, on a lark, if you will, we started to look at rings. Not seeing anything that we particularly loved, we decided to design our own – and our “information gathering” mission to the local jeweler turned into an actual design session. Over the next few weeks we were actually picking out stones and settings, looking at CAD drawing mock-ups, wax mock-ups, and money was exchanging hands.

Are we really doing this? Yes, yes we are.

Again, Practicality spoke up and said, “You’re in no hurry. Why not put off an ‘official’ proposal until summer? You’ll have been together approximately 9 months by then. That’s a respectable amount of time. No one should accuse you of rushing into anything.” I listened to Practicality and agreed, as did BF. It gave him some time to concoct a fun way to propose.

This past Saturday we went to pick up the finished ring. I tried it on and immediately girled out. I’m so embarrassed. I turned into a freakin’ raccoon – distracted by shiny objects, compelled to hoard. Pathetic!

I struggled all day Saturday and Sunday, putting the ring on, taking it back off, wrestling with whether or not I could actually put it away in a safe deposit box for the next 3 months or so. BF was no help. I believe the raccoon came out in him as well.

“Just wear it!” he says.

“I don’t know… It is *awfully* pretty, isn’t it?” I said, staring at it.

“It’s gorgeous!”

I’m still staring. It practically glows in the dark.

“But what if people ask how you proposed? What should I tell them?” I asked.

“I don’t know. Make something up, but make me look good.”

Now he’s staring at it.

“It’s not like we haven’t already committed to each other,” he points out.

“Telling the truth is a more hilarious story. I think I’ll just stick with that.”

We snap some pictures (which most of you have seen) and emailed them out. They’re not the best pics – my socks are more in focus than the ring – but if you shrink them down until they are in focus, you get the idea. Trust me, it’s gorgeous.

So, I guess by default, we are officially engaged. I am wearing the ring in public, and happily accepting the “oooohs” and “aaaaaahs” and general fussing that it is generating. BF (or is it just F for fiancé now?) is trying to decide if we should still have some sort of proposal with a production (you know, like in the movies). I’m not pushing for it. I’m willing to skip ahead (ha, like we haven’t already) to just flat out celebrating. So, we’ll see. I’ll keep you posted.

Answers to FAQ’s:

Yes, those are rubies. Rubies are my birthstone. For July.

Yes, I know the stones look huge, but it’s an optical illusion. I am freakishly small, so on my petite hand the stones appear rather large.

Yes, I am rather modest.

No, we haven’t set a date. The most I can tell you is it’ll be in 2009. I didn’t think I’d have to give you a date just yet. Remember, I was planning on having to figure that out this summer.

Yes, we do have a general plan. Now, I may have girled out over jewelry, but I do not girl out over weddings. I like to attend weddings. I like to be in other people’s weddings. The whole planning and organizing part? Yeah, that makes my skin crawl. Completely sucks the fun out of it for me. Do. Not. Want.

The plan for now is to get hitched at our local court house, then fly down to Mexico where we will have a small ceremony to appease our attending parents, followed by a small vacay/honeymoon on the beach.

“Do I have to wear shoes??” F asks.

“Of course not. I probably won’t either,” I say.


As for the rest of you: When we get back to MN we’ll throw a big informal reception. And by “informal” I’m talking about something along the lines of reserving a park, having food catered in, and everyone shows up in T-shirts and shorts. That’s about the extent of my desire to plan. Bridezilla I am not.

Yes, we are moving in together. My lease on my townhouse is up at the end of June, and I’ve already started moving stuff over to F’s house, where we will be living. You’ll all be informed of the change of address this summer. Phone number won’t change.

OK, I don’t think I’ve left any pertinent details out. I hope everyone is satisfied, all of your burning questions answered, and you’re just as giddy as I am!


Blogger MistressBioNerd said...

Your proposal is better than mine. I was called an asshole during my proposal. All I can say is what proposal could be more fitting for us? None, that's what.

8:51 AM  
Blogger dressagemom said...

I think your story is sweet. :) I'm so happy for both of you. Craig is 98% happy - he's bummed that the threesome is officially off the table. ;)

8:54 AM  
Blogger Lil Kate said...

MBN: Did I really have a proposal? What part counts as the real proposal?

DM: Man! If only I'd known beforehand! See, you have to clue me in to these things. ;) 2% bummed isn't so bad.

10:46 AM  
Blogger craig said...

First: "my little Stepbro got married! So, congrats to him and his new Dutch bride."

Did you know that in Japan blow-up sex dolls are called "Dutch wives"? Just a little something to mention to your stepbrother.

And wedding planning doens't have to suck. Sheri and I actually had a pretty good time doing it. Granted, it helped that she had lots of experience and knew what to expect.

We basically divided up the stuff by what we cared about: I had a strong idea for the cake topper, so I handled that. I didn't really care what kind of flowers we had, but Sheri did, so she handled that. We both were invested in the music, so we auditioned people together. It doesn't have to be stressful.

Funny story: the day of our wedding we were at the site (we got married at a cool little stone lodge) in the morning, just starting to get ready. The site manager asked if we'd care if another couple toured the site. Since we didn't really have anything going on for hours, we said sure. The couple asked us when our wedding was, and they were blown away when we told them it was that day. "You both look so calm!" they said.

We had a lot of fun on our wedding day.

11:07 AM  
Blogger MistressBioNerd said...

Well, I guess you didn't have a "get down on one knee, ask for your hand in marriage" situation, but I consider the "Just wear it!" a proposal of sorts.

So, I guess I shouldn't have said proposal. I guess I considered the researching of the ring, picking it up and having it in your possession the "proposal".

Hmm, I was trying to think of a more appropriate word than proposal, but I'm stumped.

Anyway, I think the whole story is great. Congratulations again!

12:33 PM  
Blogger Lil Kate said...

MBN: I was just hoping I hadn't missed it! ;)

C: I appreciate your tale of stress-free planning - it's one of 2 I've heard now. Of course most people like to complain - it makes for a better story. I'm still not sold on the idea, though.

3:00 PM  
Blogger craig said...

Maybe not so much a "proposal" as a "level up." Think about it... you went on a quest, snagged the treasure, and now have more experience points!

Wow... how geeky am I?

10:04 AM  
Blogger Linnea said...

Being newly engaged (and terribly excited about the whole planning thing!) - I have wandered into a few wedding websites and FYI the popular abbreviation for fiance is fi. That happens to be about all I have learned from the bridal sites....but I'll keep you posted;)

10:53 AM  
Blogger Just a Doc said...

This comment has been removed by the author.

8:34 PM  
Blogger Just a Doc said...

Sorry, I messed that last one up. What I meant to say is that everyone will have wedding advice to give you. Don't listen to any of it. Mine included. :)

8:36 PM  
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1:10 PM  

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